Thoughts on Friendship

I have been blessed repeatedly by Amy Scott’s Humble Musings, so this certainly not the first time I’ve linked to Humble Amy.  I appreciated her thoughts today on friendship, and wanted to share them with you.

My thoughts have been returning often lately to friendship – specifically to real friendship, as in friends with whom you can be real.  I am troubled by the degree to which we (“we” being specifically Christians in modern day U.S.A.) are generally not genuine with one another.  We put on our happy face and do our best to be seen as “together.”  I am becoming increasingly convinced that our lack of “realness” is extremely detrimental to the body of Christ, as well as to the world around us.  How are we to “confess (our) sins to one another and pray for one another, that (we) may be healed” (James 5.16) if we constantly keep on our masks?
The last few years have brought a blessing to my life that is rare treasure.  God has given me a bosom friend (as Anne would say), and a friendship in which there is a deep mutual realness.  It is unspeakably encouraging to me, as I seek to laid hold of that for which I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus, to know that my dear friend is struggling along beside me.  The depth to which we can be spiritually naked with each other helps us both to keep seeking after our Saviour.  We don’t have it perfected yet… but that’s okay, because we both know that we’re still “in process” that that He Who promised is faithful.
I’m so thankful for the friendships the Lord has given me.  I am blessed to have a wonderful circle of friends who love and pray for me.  I am seeking to be more genuine with those in my life.  But I’m going to be genuine with you and say that it is stinking hard sometimes.  How many people really want to hear that I yell at my children, have forgiveness issues, have self-destructive tendencies, struggle with disturbing sin, doubt my Saviour’s love, and more?  And I’m not proposing that we blurt out our deepest and darkest struggles to everyone we meet.  But my goal is to wear my “got-it-all-together” mask less often… to be genuine… to be approachable… to be a real friend.   

8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Merri
    Sep 24, 2008 @ 20:37:00

    This has also been on my mind (funny I just read Amy’s post, then yours!) True, real exposing friendship–that kind that is useful and good for both of you takes so long to develop it seems…Happy anniversary to you!


  2. Tracy Crowe Jones
    Sep 25, 2008 @ 00:08:00

    I do! I do! I do!I hope you know I am always here and, I pray, always ready to not only be real, but to let you be real with me.My love and admiration for you is unwavering.


  3. Laurel
    Sep 25, 2008 @ 09:05:00

    I love you too, Tracy!And the story of how God has preserved our friendship through the years is one that still amazes me. I’m so thankful for you!


  4. Eryn
    Sep 25, 2008 @ 16:54:00

    laurel, our church has recently been teaching a lot on this subject. it is a subject close to their heart and one i have been thinking on a lot lately too. thanks for the post. i have a question for you. shayne allan had a family move in her neighborhood and they are about to have their 4th child. she is doing a home birth with a midwife. which aunt joyce and i both told her were illegal. but shayne said the neighbors said, it was just legalized. i knew you would know, so…can you tell me whats up? i thought for sure you would have tons of praise on her if it was, but i cant find anything. did i miss it? thanks,


  5. Eryn
    Sep 25, 2008 @ 16:55:00

    on here*, not her. whoops.


  6. Laurel
    Sep 27, 2008 @ 16:23:00

    Eryn, my excitement about the legalization about Certified Professional Midwives becoming legal in Missouri was sandwiched in the midst of Katie’s birth story in June. Here are a couple of posts – and – it’s great news!


  7. MagenRanae
    Sep 28, 2008 @ 21:58:00

    Thanks for this post, Laurel. I’ve also been thinking on this in the last couple of weeks, and I’m really not sure how it’s really supposed to be lived out, ya know?Is this “mask-less” life supposed to be lived out to believers and non-believers alike? I tend to think it is…But then, in being real with one another, how do we keep from being whiners and complainers?I really appreciated this post. Obviously, I’ve not solidified my thoughts on it.


  8. Laurel
    Sep 28, 2008 @ 22:38:00

    I haven’t figured out how it looks “with skin on” either, Magen. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!


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